Dear Food Channel,

As much as I'd love to try making your recipes, I simply do not have 6 hours of spare time to wait for the food to cook while stirring every hour. I cannot afford the 1 hour preparation time to cut and wash everything.

It is a nice fantasy to watch your cooks in your sparkling kitchens with all the food pre-cut though. Too bad its not my reality.

Notes to self:

If you want something bad enough, nothing is stopping you. How an indie filmmaker cut out the middleman

I get by with a little help from my friends...

I always feel better after phone calls with the best friend. I just realized that despite all the supposed "cons" in my life right now, that I am actually really blessed. It helps to know that someone is right there with you after every down moment.

On another note, I was invited to a party with the Drama Society. I'm not going to go because I don't want to see what everyone looks like drunk. It doesn't seem appealing somehow.

Now, on to finishing this monster essay!

Library Thoughts

Today my mom dropped me off a block away from the library, making me walk there, saying that I "needed the exercise". She was going to go in the library's direction anyway but decided that I needed the fresh air. She drove off with an evil smile, leaving me with my backpack and winter jacket in the cold. Thanks mom...

On the way to library, I obviously got distracted, and ended up in a free-admission art gallery run by the university. I learnt that artists often B.S. their artist statements about their strange pieces of work. Even if the artwork looks like crap, it means something deep apparently. I think I could be a good artist.

At the library now. An hour ago, my laptop was overheating and I was greeted with, as all the techgeeks say "the blue screen of death". It was pretty horrible. The internet here sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. It's not a good day to be a U of T student.

Comparisions

Day after day I feel stupider and stupider. Here I am moaning and complaining about the TTC's increased fees and there are others out there who are reading Malthus and commenting on how contraception will reduce poverty in our economic times.

I feel like the marks I get in class aren't deserved now. There is always someone out there who is smarter, better.

Not me, today.

The world is quick and I feel like I'm running behind.

Resemblaces between Don and KevJumba:

Both are asian. Both are Mandarin. Both are cute and funny. Both are 19. Both have had at least 3 girlfriends.

One goes to school in California, one goes to school in Ontario.

Trying to decide which one is cuter...

KevJumba is definitely funnier (sorry Don), but he's not as fit?

One is a celebrity and has thousands of girl fans, but the other will always have a place in my heart.

Thanks for the laugh today, Youtube.

Yeah, that's life...

How sad. I wrote our anniversary in my calendar and now I have to cross it out.

Note to Self #2:

No more watching depressing films. Life is depressing enough. Too much thinking wears out the brain anyway. It's easier to be a "bimbo" and watch chick-flicks/rom-coms all day.

Songs I'm really feeling right now

Hopelessly Devoted to You- Olivia John Newton
All By Myself- Celine Dion

This is pathetic I know, wallowing in self-pity and break-up songs- but what else can I do?

Charm 101

Many people underestimate the power of charm. These are the same types of people who give up easily.

I have gotten into a sold-out concert for free, gotten free food (once, it was a catered event and I wasn't invited), gotten my math teacher to change my grade, gotten myself employed...

One of the things you have to understand about charm is that you can use it to get things you want. You can also use it to win people over.

I discovered this back in high school when I was performing a song at the talent show my high school organizes. I changed the song last minute and I added a guitar player, however I didn't tell the person who was organizing the show with enough time beforehand. In my mind, I didn't think it would be a big deal because I just needed an extra chair for him to sit beside me, they wouldn't need to add an extra mic or anything. No biggie right?

Wrong. Apparently, since he would be sitting beside me (we were doing an acoustic set), the whole lighting scheme would change. One spotlight wouldn't be big enough for both of us.

I was trying my hardest to convince the woman supervisor, but she wouldn't let me perform the song because it was last minute and it wasn't written into the script. And then the male teacher who was incharge of the whole production came in and asked what was wrong. I told him my case. At the end, he said it was no problem, and I was able to perform the song I wanted to. He pulled me in for a hug (which was kind of uncomfortable for me), but I let him hug me anyway because of what he just did for me.

And that was the start of me realizing what my womanly charm could do.

Men can charm too, so if you're male and you're reading this, don't feel disadvantaged.

I was at a bookstore today, and the bookstore owner, a man in his 40s tried to get me to buy more books by referring to me as the "pretty young lady". He wasn't hitting on me and I didn't find him creepy. It's completely fine to dole out compliments. Infact, I found his friendliness quite genuine and it makes me want to continue being a customer. I should also add that there are many men out there who use their charm to seduce women into one-night stands, and it works quite often.

The other time when I got both me and my then-boyfriend into the sold out show for free, the boyfriend complained that it seemed like I was begging and he was ashamed of standing next to me.

From one perspective, yes, getting things for free after persuading people to give them to you is similar to begging. On the other hand, I see it as using powerful convincing skills to get what you need. I explained to the guy incharge of the doors that I absolutely had to see the band that was sold out and if I could, I'd pay money to see them because they were one of my favourite acts. He was hesitant at first, but in the end, after seeing my determination, both me and the boyfriend got in for free. We saved $45 each! Woohoo!

There was a journalist who came to my university to speak. She was once captured in a foreign country and held in prison. After the guards checked to see that she was indeed a journalist and not a spy, they let her go. There was only one problem, all of her belongings were in her car, which was in an enemy territory. She managed to convince the guards to retrieve all of her things!

If you're reading this, wondering how this blog post applies to you, here are some lessons you can take away:
1. Don't take no for an answer, there is a way around things most of the time.
2. Don't be afraid to ask for more.
3. You can get people to like you and to help you out using charm.

Have fun!

Forgetful Week

First, I forgot to bring my cell phone to school so my friend couldn't call me to tell me she was going to be late.

Second, yesterday, I switched purses and I forgot to put my wallet in my new purse. I ended up not being able to shop. It was embarrassing, I had my stuff all ready to go and the cashier (who was my friend-more embarassing) rang everything up, and I was like "I forgot my wallet". Walk of shame back out the door and pissy mood for the rest of the day.

Today, I remembered my cell phone, I remembered my wallet. I forgot to bring house keys! Me and my mom left at the same time, and she locked the door.

Hopefully next week, I'll have my head screwed on right.

Dear handsome man in late 20s. Stop checking me out, I see your wedding ring. That is disgusting!

Found this really sweet:

Butch Walker on Twitter: Someone next to me just ordered your favorite drink at the coffee shop... Made me smile...

Notes to self:

1. Write more hard news pieces in the next few months. Your portfolio is not the greatest.
2. Have courage.
3. Finish reading "On the Road". It's been a year now. This is getting ridiculous...
4. One day, you'll be doing greater things and all of this won't matter.

Moving to LA

Not yet... but maybe.

I'm scared though. I know that the people are sketchy and I'll get beat up for sure if I wander around at night by myself. Everyone there is tattooed. There are tattoo parlours on every block. It makes me think LA is more hardcore than other cities, which probably it is because celebrities hang out there all the time and we all know that celebrities like to party and snort coke.

It's also expensive to live there, says this guide. $800-$1000 rent? Yeah right, like I can afford that each month. Maybe if I make a special deal with the landlord *wink* *wink*, but probably not.

The reality is probably I'll be stuck with a crummy waitressing job alongside wannabe filmstars instead of working at an internship.

I think I'm better off in NY.
Or maybe Toronto, come to think of it. I'm just sick of this city, need to be somewhere new.

All we ever do is say goodbye

I just saw Love Actually again.
I wasn't aware that I saw it already, but I knew it was familiar when I saw the little boy in the movie. He is adorable.

The movie makes me want to be a couple all over again. It makes me want to hold hands and cuddle under covers and take strolls while snow is falling all around. I want to wear winter jackets and listen to jazz music in shops and walk around downtown and hope everything is perfect and give gifts and eat fancy dinners.

Listening to brand new John Mayer right now. As always, it needs time to grow on me.

I don't think I could be happier at this moment, except for one thing. But it's nice to take a break. I didn't do any work today, just finished my journalism papers, ate breakfast went to sleep again at 12pm, woke up, took a shower, dressed up, went shopping (only bought two CDs for myself). Christmas music is playing in the malls! "Lunch" at 3pm was fried korean dumplings $2 from the Toronto Carts. Shopped at Sporting Life, pretended that I could afford $1000 Prada stuff... yeah right... read magazines in Indigo. Wished I could stay longer, went home and watched Love Actually, and now I'm typing.

I guess I'm not working at the Toronto Star this summer

A Toronto Star internship was something that I was thinking about doing over the summer, but as I read on their requirements: I would have had to have experience working at a daily, which I do not. Also, the deadline to apply is two days from now and that is much too soon to get together references, a coverletter and a resume.

So now the question is: what do I really want to do with my summer?

I think I want to move to New York... :)

Hopefully that works out and I'll be interning at a magazine. I've got a few in mind... ;)

Movie Review: The Prestige

I am going to have to take movie recommendations more seriously after this. This movie was absolutely brilliant. The ending was still sort of sad, but I loved all the tricks. The costumes were amazing, Christian Bale is really sharp...

The story, that is what pulls it all together. Without a good story, you have nothing. I don't even know what to say, The Prestige was absolutely stunning.

Christopher Nolan is really good at what he does, no doubt.

...and I loved that the little girl was named Jess.

This is kinda sad, but...

I think I need someone to chaperone me when I go shopping. Today's purchases were reckless and possibly unnecessary. I bought a black cover-up, but I already have one. They look different of course, but they are interchangable. (If only I bought the tan coloured one that was there a few weeks ago at that time- they were sold out this time)

I'd like to think that I can handle everything myself, that I can be an independent woman, but that is not the case. I need someone to stop me from buying stuff! HELP!

How Scandalous!

This is the story of the female student reporter who went to interview a young campus police officer and left with his personal phone number.

True story.

Notes for guys:

How to get woman to fail head over heels for you:

1. Mention that you are a romantic and that you love romance movies.
2. Say that you wouldn't ever pursue someone just because they're good looking and that you're not in it for sex.

Tips for women if you ever meet a guy like this:

1. Ask him what his favourite romance movie is to see if he's for real.
2. If he seems genuine, ask him for his number.

Done.

My Problems with Porn

Basically, I don't think guys should watch it because they will develop unrealistic expectations and then they will be disappointed when they have sex.

It also makes them feel self-conscious about their endowments below because male porn stars are hired for their size. They're not normal, nope.

Mis-interpreting Christianity

On Wednesday, I went with my church to go see The I-Heart Movie. It's a well-done movie which the trailer doesn't give justice to. I went into the theatre not wanting to be there, wondering "what in the world have I gotten myself into?" Hold on, before you continue reading, if you haven't already, click on the link and watch the trailer.

It's an inspirational Christian movie, and it made me realize a couple of things.
One of them being that I feel that it is harder to say that you are Christian these days, than to admit that you're gay. I find this ironic because it used to be the opposite a few years ago.

Here's why I think this: First of all, when people hear that you're a Christian, they automatically assume that you're all self-righteous and hypocritical, or like a cheesy Ned Flanders, or even a conservative goody-two shoes. They think you've got a disease or something. If you don't believe me, you should hear how a few people at my old workplace talk about Christians.

On the other hand, its easier to be gay these days because of all the media discourse they get about their issues. Gay people are seen as victims of society. Of course, it was different a few years back, but now this is what it is.

Christians are seen as hypocritical because:
1. The Crusades, where lots of innocent (and not so innocent) people were killed through a religious battle by Christians.

However, anyone who is familiar with the Bible will know that killing people is not something Christians are supposed to do. The best I can do to explain the Crusades is that the people in command of the killing sprees weren't influenced by God, but rather a different source. It is tragic that the image of God was distorted by these killers.

2. There are many people out there today that claim they are Christian, but don't live out a life that reflects God. From little things like swearing, to even bigger things like pre-marital sex, non-believers only see hypocrites. Non-believers see Christians sinning and setting bad examples again and again, which leads to Christianity as a whole to seem like a big lie.

Of course, no one is perfect, which is why we need God in the first place. Through our weaknesses, we begin to see his strength. Non-Christians need to see that Christians are just people too, and not judge the religion based on the mistakes Christians make.

3. Sometimes, Christians aren't very loving, but seem more judgmental. The movie, I-Heart, showed a person holding up a sign that said "GOD HATES FAGS", which isn't true. God loves everyone, its just that He created woman to be with man. It says in Leviticus 20:13, "If a man has sex with a man as one does with a woman, both of them have done what is abhorrent". God does not hate "fags", but rather, hates the sin of homosexuality.

Deconstruction of "Bright Lights"

Lyrically, this song contains a lot of wisdom. The lyrics are vague, but you get the gist of the idea. The girlfriend of the lead singer is leaving to pursue an acting career in New York city. It sounds like theatre, because if it were movies, she'd be moving to Hollywood. There's also the line "another alien on Broadway", which could reference a street she's moving to, or the actual stage.

I find it incredible that lead singer Rob Thomas can sum up the story with lines like "took all except my name" and "some things in this world you just can't change, some things you can't see until it gets too late".

The latter is such a general statement, it can apply to everyone- which is the genius of these songs. They are so general and vague that anyone can relate to them, and thus, the popularity of the song grows, because people have a bond over them.

Another thing that draws you in to this song is the emotion in it. The singer wants her to come back. He narrates the story so that the audience has an involvement in it, then repeats "come on home" throughout the song. This leads to the audience being affected by the song if they couldn't relate to it in the first place.

Besides the lyrics and the emotion, another selling point is the actual music itself. It follows the typical verse and then build up to the chorus. Added in is a bonus stunner of a guitar solo. The chord progressions are quite simple, but it lets the strength of the melody and emotion shine through. There is also the melody of the lead guitar in the background which starts somewhere in the middle. It adds a sophisticated polish to the already developed song.

Today's awkwardly funny story in 100 words or less

I have this friend that I know somewhat, we met through a club. I said hi to him once and he didn't recognize me, but he recognized me when I said hi today.

I would like to say that I'm a naturally very friendly person to everyone, but I guess my friend thought I was hitting on him, so he introduced me to his boyfriend.

Yeah... it was pretty awkward. Honestly though, I wasn't hitting on him!